The Letting Go and Letting In of Indy

 

I recently made a very big decision.  It came after many long hours of trying to decide what my heart was saying all while reasoning out the logic in my mind.  I lessoned for about 2 years on a now 12 year old Arabian mare.   When I met her she was nine going on ten and our paths crossed at a pivotal moment in life.  I was looking to get back involved with horses and she was looking to get back involved with humans.  How Indy and I came to be is a story in it of itself, but for now, know that only divine timing could have aligned the stars in just the right spot for our paths to cross.

 

I was to begin riding lessons again at a Natural Horsemanship facility in Spring Grove, IL, Meadowsweet Ranch.  I wanted to learn about horses from a perspective other than the hunter/jumper style I was all too familiar with. I let my new trainer, Kathy; know that I wanted to work     with a horse that had little experience so that I could really see how to communicate with horses.  I did not want a seasoned school horse to just go through the motions with me.  I want to clarify to you, my readers, what I did not clarify to Kathy.  By no experience, I meant no natural horsemanship experience.  I DID, however, want a horse that was trained to ride!!!

 

Needless to say, Indy and I became partners.  A just back in the saddle after many years rider, paired with an energetic, to say the least, green broke Arabian mare.  For those of you who don’t know, green broke means she basically knew how to walk on a lead line from her pasture to her stall and how to stand somewhat quietly while being groomed.  As far as people were concerned, Indy thought we should be on the ground.

 

In the beginning we did a lot of ground work which worked wonders to establish a bond between Indy and me, but as we neared the date for our first ride together I became increasingly nervous about her reaction.  My anxiety and fear began to intensify not only in the arena, but in life.  Time and time again, Indy proved herself to me.  At every turn, I had to choose to push through the fears because if not me, then who would be there for Indy.  I knew I could never let her down.  She took to carting me around the arena like a champion.  Although we hit many bumps in the road, we were always the very thing that each other needed to move forward on our path.  Whether it was fear of falling off, anxiety over this that or the other, frustration of “why can’t we get this right” or are we ever going to get there, Indy and I never quit each other.

 

One day I made the realization that there was no place to get.  We were already there.  Every step of the way, Indy brought some life changing lesson to the table.  It was, get your head on straight so you can send me a clear message, breathe so I know we are still ok, or slow down so we can be on the same page.   She taught me how to love something that didn’t always know how to love back and she taught me that this too shall pass and tomorrow is another day.  It was this journey with her, not the destination, which opened my heart and soul to the possibilities.  It was this journey with her that allowed me to remember who I am and to embrace the beauty of even the things we don’t understand.

 

In the end, she taught me how to let go and move on.  She taught me that even though things can be hard, we sometimes have to keep moving forward and have faith that if we follow our hearts; we will never have to be afraid again.  It was Indy who taught me how to live in the moment because there is always so much to learn right here, right now, in this moment.  If we move too fast, we miss the opportunity to awaken to grace.

 

I think of Indy often and wish her all of the many blessings she brought to my life.  It is amazing how the smallest moments in time can have the biggest impact if we let them; if we are aware and conscious of their presence.  At times I still feel like I left her when I made the decision to no longer lesson.  During that time, I had rescued a 4 month old Belgian Draft horse and he was really calling to me for more time/training.  I sometimes wonder if Indy didn’t know Boude was coming and if all of our time together was in preparation of what’s to come.  Only time will tell what is in our future, but in my heart, I know our paths will cross again when the stars are aligned just right.  Until then, I will look fondly on our time together and remember the many lessons I learned, one of them being, breathe in, breathe out, move on.  Life is a series of lessons and each one builds on the next and if we quiet our minds and slow down enough, we just might catch the magnificence and connectedness of it all.

 

 

Beth Sabor is a nationally certified massage therapist, reiki master, craniosacral practitioner, animal communicator, certified holistic health practitioner, and registered yoga teacher.  She lives in Spring Grove as owner/operator of Holistic Essence and offers holistic therapies for animals and their human companions. 

 

 

 

 

HOLISTIC ESSENCE 2014  © Beth Sabor E-mail:  bkmassage1@yahoo.com Phone: 847-366-0087